This is my life, and this is my pain.
posted by Forbidden Dark @ Sunday, May 07, 2006
Dear "Gift opf God", I passed for the same than you, but that is part of my past. I am Roman Catholic and I know how difficult is to live with that "nightmare", but remember that your sexuality is only ONE aspect of your life, and you know that you are so many other things! Your sexuality is important when you decide to go to sleep with another person, but how many heterosexuals do you know that sleep alone and feel that they must change your life for the life of them? You do not need to put your sexulaity as the center of your life. From a very orthodox Catholic theology point of view, I can tell you that there is no such thing as bad desire, but rather that desire sometimes gets held up or stuck, rather than moving onward towards it's aim. This conception, of desires as the moving force God uses to guide us toward him resonates strongly with me. Yet it does raise difficulties. How should we understand the phrase of Saint Benedict, "the dictatorship of desires"? How do some of the dark perversions and hatreds that we know exist in the world fit into such a thesis?The dictatorship of desire refers to what happens when our desires are not lived as an invitation to look further to what alone satisfies our heart. When that happens we "divinize" the particular desires, believing them to be able to satisfy totally our thirst for happiness.
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Recovering from homosexuality.
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